I just saw some older-middle-aged guy in the bathroom with an enormous gut and a hideous combover. The gut part isn't such a big deal; I mean, who in America isn't at least somewhat overweight in these supersized days? But the combover part... it made me realize. I think The Donald's success on TV may have convinced balding men everywhere that they can totally get away with the combover. They say to themselves, "Well, that guy's pulling it off, so why not me?" Don't they understand that The Donald could wear a wreath of dead sewer rats on his head and still inspire hyper-religious levels of ass-kissing? Ah, well.