Oh yeah, I'm so far off the wagon that it's a tiny speck in the distance. But I did my week and now, thank god, it's over. If I had it to do all over again, I think what I'd first change is the part about not drinking caffeine for a week. Because caffeine is awesome, and that's just stupid. But the other main thing I'd change is the way I broke my fast. Did I wake up Sunday morning a little groggy and head out for a nice tall iced latte from Coffee Bean? Um, no. I grabbed a handful of dark chocolate espresso beans at 12:30 A.M. and chowed down. Consumption of plenty of booze prior to/after that enabled me to fall into a blissful sleep at about 3 AM, but the catch was that I bolted awake 3 hours later; the alcohol was fully digested by then, leaving those concentrated caffeine nuggets to hop in their El Camino and go cruising through my blood/brain barrier. I got a couple more scattered hours of sleep and spent Sunday mostly in a haze. Thus, ironically, the relapse was more difficult than the detox. How about that?
Today was totally different, though. Got a good night's sleep, felt pretty much awake the first couple hours of the day, felt, in fact, like I didn't really need to go to Starbucks. I just went because I could. And holy fucking shit, did I ever feel great after that. Even 2 hours later, as I was walking back to my car to go home for lunch, I actually said to myself, "Damn, I feel fucking great."
I've never done any recreational stimulant drugs, but I don't see how they could be any better than caffeine. Plus, as I understand it, they're expensive. Caffeine = cheap and comes inside a tasty drink (as in the case of an iced latte or diet Pepsi, both of which I've had today) or a delicious snack (as in the case of Trader Joe's dark chocolate covered espresso beans, which I've also had).
So in conclusion, no, I'm not a caffeine addict. I could quit at any time, and I even proved it. But I don't plan on doing it again anytime soon.
Monday, August 15, 2005
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